We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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