no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
