But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
