It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
