New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
