Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Randomize
