BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
