also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
