There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
