that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I think people are normalizing furries
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
