all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
