Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
