I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I wish you could order shots online.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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