Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
4 words: hood of his car
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Randomize