tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
