All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
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