yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
