This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Dignity is for republicans.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
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