it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
