Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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