i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
