I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
