Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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