so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Randomize