"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
