at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
