I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
