I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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