i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
