If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
