whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
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