why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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