A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
