Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
