okay pat passed out under dana's car
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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