this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
