margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Randomize
