don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
