Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
