So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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