At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
