I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
