oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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