So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize