ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
This gyro tastes like lonliness
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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