At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
