It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
