What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize