I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize