I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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